FRIDAY SERMON: Choice of Friendship
True friendship does not change with time — it changes time itself through sincerity and trust.
Muhammad Younis Bhat (Zahid)
Allah Almighty has created human beings as social creatures. No one can live a meaningful life in isolation because every individual needs understanding, compassion, and companionship. Among all relationships, friendship holds a special place — it brings joy, trust, and support to life. However, if the choice of friends is wrong, it can destroy a person’s character, peace, and future. Therefore, the choice of friendship is among the most crucial decisions one makes in life.
Qualities of a good friend
Friendship ensures for us best advice and encouragement. Friends guide us and save us from going astray. Friends are helpful in all actions and on all occasions. A friend is another self, maybe even more than that, just think of things which you can not do but a friend can do for you. He can sing your praises to others. He can accomplish things left incomplete by you. He can beg or supplicate for you with all grace.
Friendship has an ennobling influence on the life and character of a person. He develops the qualities of selfless devotion, charity,sacrifice and tolerance. Friendship knits a bond of affection between different persons.
There are certain conditions of friendship which must be fulfilled by those who want to be happy in there friendship. Friendship is a matter of give and take. One has got to give up selfishness to gain friends, constancy is another quality that has to be acquired. Long loyalty, mutual confidence and mutual sympathy are necessary more than anything else. Friends must be ready to stand up by each other through thick and thin. Jealousy is the enemy of friendship. Never let suspension and jealousy find a place in your heart. Trust your friend in all situations and under all circumstances you must be accomodating. Friendships are formed in youth when hearts are warn and full of fellow feelings.
A true friend is the most precious treasure of life. Cherish true friends, helps them, work for them, defend them, rejoice with them, if they prosper, sympathise with them in their difficulties, console them if they are in trouble. Such a rare possession must be carefully preserved.
“Friendship is love without his wings”
“Friendship knows no rank, it makes no distinction between a king and a beggar”
“A true friend can be left but can’t deceived”
Benefits of Good Friendship
A true friend is a precious gift from Allah Almighty. A good friend strengthens faith, refines character, and brings peace to the soul. Such friendship inspires honesty, humility, and kindness. A sincere companion guides you toward the right path and becomes a source of comfort in times of hardship.
The Holy Qur’an says:
“Close friends, that Day, will be enemies to each other, except for the righteous.”
(Surah Az-Zukhruf, 43:67)
This verse teaches that true friendship is founded on piety, goodness, and sincerity. Only such bonds will survive and hold value in the Hereafter.
Demerits of Bad Friendship
Bad company is like a slow poison that gradually kills one’s faith and morality. It pushes a person toward wrongdoing and spiritual decline. The proverb says, “A man is known by the company he keeps.”
The Holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said:
“A man follows the religion of his friend; so each one should consider whom he makes his friend.”
(Abu Dawood)
Wrong companionship can ruin good habits, promote sinful behavior, and destroy one’s peace of mind. Therefore, it is essential to choose friends wisely — those who bring light, not darkness, into one’s life.
Golden Principles of Friendship
- In friendship, separation causes less pain than unfaithfulness.
- Friendship must always be unconditional, without interference in each other’s natural personality.
- Both friends should maintain zero expectations — selfless friendship is the strongest bond.
- Their characters should be such that others feel inspired to be like them.
- Feelings and emotions are the foundation of friendship — they must understand each other’s silence and unspoken words.
- Friends are human beings, not angels — they can make mistakes, so forgiveness is essential.
- Mutual respect, compassion, and forgiveness must remain at the heart of every friendship.
Friendship with Opposite Gender — An Alarming Trend
Today, a dangerous trend has emerged among the youth — the desire to form friendships with the opposite sex. Unfortunately, this tendency is spreading rapidly from school students to university level, fueled by social media and modern communication.
According to Islamic teachings, any kind of unnecessary friendship, conversation, or relationship between non-mahram men and women is strictly prohibited (Haraam).
The Holy Qur’an commands:
“Do not approach adultery; indeed, it is an immorality and an evil way.”
(Surah Al-Isra, 17:32)
This verse clearly prohibits not only the act itself but also all paths that lead toward it.
Friendships between non-mahrams often begin innocently but eventually result in moral corruption, loss of modesty, and the weakening of faith.
The youth are therefore strongly advised to avoid such Haraam relationships, for Islam has laid down clear boundaries to protect one’s purity and dignity.
The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said:
“Modesty (Haya) is a part of faith.”
(Sahih Bukhari)
True friendship is that which is established for the sake of Allah’s pleasure, not for worldly desires or emotional excitement.
Message for Parents and Guardians
Parents and guardians hold a great responsibility to monitor and guide their children’s friendships. They should observe who their children interact with, how they speak, and where they spend most of their time.
It is wise for parents to occasionally visit their children’s friends’ homes to understand their environment, behavior, and moral background.
Sometimes, even well-mannered children are influenced negatively by bad company.
Therefore, parents must stay alert and involved in their children’s social circles.
Parents and guardians must also be extremely cautious about the physical proximity of their children with friends, especially as they approach adolescence. Under no circumstances should two friends be allowed to sleep together in the same bed. During the teenage years, curiosity and emotional development are at a delicate stage; a lack of boundaries may lead to the formation of habits or attachments that could later become harmful. Therefore, wise parenting demands vigilance, gentle supervision, and the establishment of respectful distance between friends when it comes to private or resting spaces. Such care does not mean mistrust—it means mature understanding of human psychology and the responsibility to protect the moral and emotional purity of the youth.
The length of friendship is not important — its depth, sincerity, and moral value are what truly matter. Having too many friends can sometimes become harmful and confusing.
A child’s future, character, and emotional balance are strongly shaped by the type of friends they keep — hence, parents’ guidance in this matter is not just necessary, it is vital.
Conclusion
Friendship is indeed one of the most valuable gifts of life — a blessing that should always be treated with gratitude and care. A good friend inspires goodness, faith, and hope; a bad one leads to regret and destruction.
True friendship does not change with time — it changes time itself through sincerity and trust.
If we choose our friends wisely, keeping faith, honesty, and compassion as the foundation, our friendships will not only make our worldly life beautiful but will also become a source of success in the Hereafter.
(Straight Talk Communications Exclusive)
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